“Most of things you worry about have never happened”
Is worrying stopping you enjoying the present moment?
Worrying is natural, we have all experienced it at some point in our lives. However, what does worry do for us? There are no positives from it. Stressing over our problems doesn’t do anything to change them. I am not sure we can stop worrying altogether however hearing the statistic that 90% of our worries never happen left me thinking of the energy we waste worrying.
So when you feel worries starting to pop up ask yourself this: How many of the things I feared would happen in my life did actually happen?
Worrying also has an effect on our brains. Excessive worry disturbs your peace of mind making it harder for you to concentrate on one task at a time.This means it may also be difficult for you to fall asleep at night. Excessive worry could even lead into depression. If you start to worry about everyone and everything day and night, feel that life is unfair and justice does not exist or become paranoid that people will betray you, these could be the first warning signs of depression.
Avoid getting lost in blurred fears.
When fears feel unclear in your mind, when you lack clarity then it is very easy to get lost in exaggerated worries and disaster scenarios.So find transparency in a worry-inducing situation by asking you realistically, what is the worst that could happen? In my experience, the worst that could realistically happens is usually not as scary as what my mind could make up when it is running with fears.
Recognise worry is a waste of time
Identifying such menacing thoughts are a waste of time, focusing on the present and avoiding distractions can all help people to take control of their angst. Firstly, recognise that worrying is a waste of time and energy. It doesn’t help anything and has no calming or problem-solving effect. Once you recognise you are worrying, ask yourself if it has any purpose or if there is even an answer to the question you are considering.
Stay in the present moment.
When you spend too much time reliving the past in your mind then it easy to start feeding your worries about the future. When you spend too much time in the future then is also easy to get swept away by disaster scenarios.So focus on spending more of your time and attention in the present moment.
Distractions don’t work
Avoid distractions as these have the opposite effect to calming the mind. Turning the focus away from your thoughts does not mean trying to escape or distract yourself from them, however. Some people often use television, gambling, computer games or even alcohol to control or quash the fretting. Distracting yourself in order to calm down doesn’t work well in the long run. Then you’re relying on other people or external things to get calm.
Refocus on the small step you can take to move forward.
To move from the worried mindset I find it really helpful to just start moving and taking action to start solving or improving whatever I am concerned about. What is one small step I can take right now to start improving this situation I am in?Then I focus on just taking that small step forward. After that I find another small step and I take that one too.
If worrying has been a way of life for someone just breaking this habit may seem too bigger jump. Some clients have found giving permission to worry for a few minutes each day can help. We sell worry stones to support this time.
Love Jo and Chloe xx